How the Chief Is Revealed As A Genius

One thing the Chief and I have learned over the last few years is this legal gem: If you are the Defendant in a civil lawsuit the Plaintiff can play merry hell with your life. If you’re not overly concerned with the trial’s outcome–because, let’s face it: as the Plaintiff you can drop the proceedings […]

The Resistance Begins At Home

We came home from the wars–that is to say Cabo San Lucas–in 1999, after a sojourn there of five years. But in Lemon Cove, where we landed, my battles with Nature continued. You might even say the front expanded–to 96 acres. We moved in to an ancient, tatterdemalion farm house in a citrus grove owned […]

The Dreaded Chicken Foot

I had intended to write about winning. Specifically how the Orange Horror averred, before his election, that we’d all get so sick of winning our heads would spin. But I could use a bit of levity just now, and give it slightly less than even money that sometime in the near future the Orange might […]

Death and Taxes

Here’s a finger in the eye of the Universe: It’s possible to find humor anywhere–even in an ICU. Unless you’re the patient. For those of us who are merely visitors, transported in a spoon to the bedside of our loved one, the experience remains harrowing. When I was a kid we used to have a […]

The Orange Horror Is A Domestic Enemy

And now the Orange Horror has barred select news outlets from the White House press briefing. CNN, The New York Times, Los Angeles Times, Politico, the BBC, Buzzfeed and the Huffington Post were each excluded from the February 23rd chinwag hosted by the president’s press bloviator, Sean Spicer. The Associated Press and Time magazine boycotted […]

Buying the Place With Beads

Years ago now–and apropos of nothing–I wrote a poem that began like so: I long to linger among the Hmong; how I hunger to hear their tongue! These nonsense poems frequently come as a sort of whisper I strive to catch up with in writing. More often than not, I’m unsuccessful. And at this remove […]

Happy New Year!

If only to send a message to the remainder of the country, California should vote to secede from the Union. Not that it could ever happen–and its certainly not something I would ever truly wish for–but this would be a shot across the bow of the 49 other states: California is rowing an aircraft carrier […]

Graduating From the Electoral College

In electing our 45th president, for just the fifth time in our history a candidate who lost the popular vote secured a victory in the Electoral College. By Thanksgiving Day, Hillary Clinton’s lead over Donald Trump surpassed two million votes. The unseemliness of this tally has prompted a call–mainly from the left–for an abolishing of […]

Donald Trump Is My President

I find revolting the election of Donald Trump as our president; then again, in voting for him, that’s what approximately half of the voting electorate did–revolt. As of 14 November, Hillary Clinton garnered 668,483 more votes than Trump. That’s about the size of Boston. The 60 million-plus who voted for Trump despite his antics did […]

Battle Hymn of the Heartsick

Mine eyes have seen the horror of the coming of the Trump; He is trampling out the vintage where the grapes of Truth ain’t plump; He has loosed the fateful lightening of a grope upon the rump, His “Truth” is lurching on. Lord above, I don’t believe it! Lord above, I don’t believe it! Lord, […]